Anecdotes from the land of dreams
Hi! after the stinkers & hate mails i recevied from my female readers for my last post , i have decided to stop writing such posts ( for a while off course :-)) and write something simple yet funny from my share of memorable happennings from this bada shehar of amreeka.
As destined by the big boss above & desired by you all, here too Sethi Sahib is going through amazing experinces and i write down below first of the series of my anecdotes from here, specially for you.
The Cab Drivers: Sethi Sahib has been on a nomadic journey since last three years. And one thing that Sethi Sahib has discovered that Cab Drivers share same innocence every where. Please Note that I am using the word innocence and not ignorance because they know lot of things but not even God above can guarantee that what they speak is accurate. So they might not be ignorant but their wrong facts make them lovingly innocent.
Given below excerpts of my two interesting conversations with Cabbies in Amreeka for your reading pleasure
Which Country is biggest?
Well this one had all my geographic fundaes going haywire.
Cabbie: Hey man where are u from?
Sethi Sahib: I come from India buddy.
Cabbie: Oh, great, that’s a very big country. (Sethi Sahib is happy to hear that and glad to know that at least here the drivers are not innocent :-))
But I guess I was wrong from the beginning as from here the conversation starts Going in different direction
Sethi Sahib: Thanks. Yes it’s indeed one of the big nations.
Cabbie: Yes! I know. Its even bigger than America (Sethi Sahib is taken aback!.. Shocked)
Sethi Sahib: Hmmm (What else a man could say in such state)
Cabbie: Yes I know India covers almost one third of the worlds land (Man this is going too much, should I take it a complement or should I correct his facts)
Sethi Sahib: It’s big but I guess not that much.
Cabbie: Might be! But there is one country which is even bigger than India and America
Sethi Sahib: (Mouth wide open, amazingly stupid expression on my face, The one I use to have in my discrete mathematics class in college when I didn’t know what was going around me )
Which country ?
Cabbie: It’s Brazil. No country can be as big as Brazil. It’s almost half of the world with them. So I guess, its Brazil number one, then comes India and then America. What do you say?
Sethi Sahib: Well I never knew that. Thanks for making me aware of this. ( Remembering my third standard Geography Teacher . Why she hated me when I gave the same answers in the class:-)))
And when I Left that taxi, I was the proudest Indian on the Airport :-)
Why Sethi Sahib is not a cab driver?
This conversation after the usual geographical blunders, made me think why the hell was I not a cab driver in AmericaJ
Cab Drivers name is Joe and for a change he knew before hand where I come from. Read below the excerpts
Joe: Buddy I know which part of the world you are from?
Sethi Sahib: Which one (with a tone as inquisitive as if I never knew where I came from)
Joe: I bet you are from Buda pest
Sethi Sahib: (Shocked again! I knew something like this was coming, but still let me try to correct him) No I am from India. (Hoping that he would be grateful to me for this info)
Joe: Yes are right! (Sethi Sahib is relieved to hear that, but then comes the shocker)
Joe: Indeed all Indian guys come from Budapest.
Sethi Sahib: What? (Sethi sahib is scratching his head to find out the logic applied for this syllogism)
Sethi Sahib: (In a vain attempt to set the facts right.) No India is a Separate Nation.
Joe: Yes India is a separate nation in Budapest, you are right!
Sethi Sahib :( Thank God I am right, so before things go out of hand and I loose my remaining ideas about the world Geography, I just hoped he changes the topic.)
And indeed I was right, He changed the topic but he asked me a question, which I feel can single handedly take any guy on this planet, out of his balance. So In case you feel like pushing a guy suddenly off the roof of a twenty storied building without any warnings, this question does the same effect. Because a guy whether married or bachelor , whether young , middle aged or old , whether actor , cricketer or politician , or doctor lawyer or an IT guy like me can never answer this question accurately with best of his abilities .
So here comes the much awaited question
Joe: Do you have a girl friend? (As expected I felt like jumping off a skyscraper without any parachute tied on my back. What should I tell him with which he can relate to All Indians from Budapest? Should I tell him I have five in five different continents or should I say I am still trying to find a girl who can be friend or No girl has found me right enough t to become a friend. In a life threatening situations like this even the thousandth part of the second becomes one whole day but I was relieved of my agony when Joe answered back himself.)
Joe : I have a girlfriend and she is coming today from Budapest ( So this was the reason the world was forced to change its geographical boundaries, A girl can make any sensible man think like the way she wants and this was the living example of that.)
Sethi Sahib: Oh great to know that!
Joe : She is a movie actress and she is shooting in Budapest ( God when this Budapest will leave me but I also wonder alongside that despite all my education and white collared job can I even think of Having a film actress as my girl friend. )
Joe: And that is why I took this trip to Airport because after I drop you, Ill picks her up from there.
SethiSahib: (Still in haze, same previous dialogue) Oh great to know that.!
Joe: And when she comes back you know what I will do.
SethiSahib: (Thinking: Everyone knows Joe that what you will do with your GF, please don’t tell me)
Joe: (Answering himself.) I take out the boat that I bought recently from the parking at the Airport and will take her to the ride on the River tonight.
Seth Sahib: (With same discrete mathematics expression on my face) you own a boat of your own?
Joe: Yes not a big one but it has a bed room, Kitchen and a room for playing pool. I will tie that boat at the rear of my car and leave directly for the river along with her.
Seth Sahib: (Same old Dialogue) Great to know that!
Joe: And then in the morning we will go to my farm in the suburbs and spend the weekend there.
Sethi Sahib: How far is the airport now? (Desperately Trying to change the topic).
But Joe went on till the time I reached the airport. This time on the airport I was wondering and analyzing why I wasted so many years , cramming so much in last 25 years , when , I could have come here straight and only thing that I required to have an actress girlfriend , A personal luxury boat , a farm house in the outskirts was nothing but a simple driving license.
But I guess even if I would have had that shining US driving license. I am sure I would still have been an Indian from the Budapest. Somethings never really change :-))
Thursday, February 16, 2006
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